No More Guilt

At least for the day, I am determined that guilt shall be banished! Begone! As a mom, I feel that I have opportunities to succeed or fail at every step, and the sooner I think I am doing well, I fall flat on my face again. However, I am going to accept that for today, for this moment, I need to let it go and be real about how I feel. The guilt about all the things I have not accomplished today is the voice of the devil trying to drown out the sound of God's promises. God loves me, God gave me my children, God is working in me to help me have the love he wants me to have for each of my kids and my husband. I can not do anything to deserve his love or his patience, but I also can not do anything to lose the privilege of his grace and his forgiveness. Lord, I give you this day. Please grant my family the sleep they each need, healing where necessary, and a special blessing upon the sister of my heart and my friend, Angie. Bless and protect Angie's dad, hold him in your hand and cover him with your peace. Thank you Father, Amen.

Mom needs time out

How overwhelmed I get sometimes! Why do I not leave time in the day for a "time out"? I have even been finding it exhausting when people ask me how I am doing. I am really tired of trying to explain why I am tired or the reasons I am sleep deprived.

But what I've really been thinking about for the last couple of days is that our kids must be as tired and overwhelmed as we are. I mean sure, they have natural energy, but they are also learning and physically growing, and taking so much in - trying to cope with their incredible world. Of course they are going to act out sometimes! I have two friends whose boys have been "in trouble" for hitting or kicking, and they feel awful, like they are the only ones in the world, which is too bad. I look at the busy little lives of our boys, and think they deserve a pass! It is the first time they have been in preschool (the friends' boys), starting Awanna as well as Wednesday evening programs. So all of a sudden, these boys not only have day preschool with new rules, new teachers and new kids to get along with, but they are also having evening activities that keep them revved up and mess with their sleep patterns. I think they just need a little slower pace, and a little grace when they don't quite immediately get the new sets of rules and boundaries.

Blessings to the moms out there, loving and teaching their preschool kids - I wish you all a good night's sleep, and a clean slate for a new day tomorrow.

My cosmic question for the blog universe today is: when did couches become so sacred?
I know so many moms who have a rule about no jumping on the couch or no playing with the couch cushions. I think couch cushions are great toys - the best building blocks ever. How did we go from being a society who lived in little cabins with dirt floors and mats to sleep on, to people who spend thousands of dollars on furniture that has to be guarded constantly? Personally, I am quite happy with my second-hand couch, even though it has acquired a few stains here and there, it is perfect for us. There are enough things that I have to say "no" to.... Anyway, I am just going on record to say that playing with the couch cushions is OK in my book - here's to my active, creative kids.

Yesteday was a bit hectic, but I was thankful that I got myself to start a pot of stew in the morning. The meat and potatoes were already cooking on low by the time we left for the open house at Esperanza's preschool. For a small school, I was amazed by how many people where there! We visited her classroom, saw her name on the table and in her cubby box. There is a neat playroom and arts and crafts room. I thought we would be there a short time, but both kids were running around having fun, so we were there about an hour and a half! By then, I was very hungry and ready for a latte, so we headed back toward home. Unfortunately, the nectarine Esperanza had at breakfast time decided to violently disagree with her. This happened once before on a trip to the zoo. I think it is when she eats with the peel on.

After lots of cleanup, and tea and soup for lunch to calm all of our stomachs, I got back to the stew pot. I got some onions and zucchini from the garden, and then started excavating the carrots. The clay-filled soil in our garden makes it so I can't pull them out. Either the greens come off, or the roots break into pieces. But using my weed-digging tool, I was finally able to get quite a few. I also had fun watching the many tiny green frogs jumping through the garden. There is a cute picture of Esperanza holding a frog - searching for frogs is one of our favorite backyard activities. I just wanted to say, for the record, that although I am not an avid gardener, I like the fact that birds and frogs like my effort, and it is a small piece of ground that can be a habitat amidst the boring lawns that surround us.

Kinder

I shouldn't have tried to create my first blog this late in the evening, when my creative juices have gone down the drain and my lower back is sore from this desk chair. However, I have hope that tomorrow I will learn more about editing this blog page.
For now, I am rejoicing in the fact that my son and daughter are fast asleep and this is my very own time. This is why I can't go to sleep until I enjoy the peace. The quiet that comes when I am the only one awake at night is a treasure, and I pay dearly for it with lack of sleep.
Today was the first full day of Kindergarten, and my son was amazing this morning as he got ready to go and meet the bus for the first time. He is growing up! His teacher calls him "your Kinder" and refers to the group of students as "Kinders", which is a new term for me. I asked him what he liked best at school today, and he said crafts, but when I asked him what they made, he just shrugged. Maybe it was the picture of the frog in his binder, very thoroughly colored green. I think he is trying hard to please his new teacher, and is off to a good start.